Insecure Attachment Relationship Coaching

Being in an intimate relationship is beautifully fulfilling. Our relationships bring us companionship, support, friendship and intimacy. Yet, when one or more partners are insecurely attached, particularly if one is anxious and the other is avoidant, there are competing needs and protection strategies that are steeped in the nervous system that make connection, fulfilment and enjoyment for both partners extremely challenging. Yet still, it is not only possible to become more securely attached, your insecurely attached partner might be precisely the person to help you to do so.

When insecure attachment patterns are present, relationships can feel like a cycle of longing and distance, leaving both partners feeling disconnected, frustrated, or misunderstood. Anxiously attached individuals often crave more closeness and reassurance, while avoidantly attached partners may feel overwhelmed by emotional intimacy and pull away to maintain a sense of independence. This dynamic can create a push-pull effect, triggering deeper feelings of rejection, abandonment or suffocation.

How can insecure attachment couples coaching help your relationship?

  • Strike a healthy balance with self-soothing and self-attunement and co-regulation.

  • Learn about attunement, the felt subjective experience, and it’s importance in secure relationships.

  • Learn skills to approach and manage conflict for each attachment style.

  • Begin to experience conflict as valuable for you and your relationship.

  • Improve communication and the ability to attune to each other's needs.

  • Understand how past relational hurt impacts your relationship and experience compassion for your partner's protective systems rather than feeling repelled or hurt by them.

  • Shift unhealthy cycles.

  • Uncover each partner's need for safety and learn to provide presence, attunement, resonance and trust (PART) for each other.

  • Build greater emotional awareness and communication skills to express your needs with clarity and confidence.

  • Learn how to cultivate trust, authenticity, and intimacy in a way that honours your needs and your partner’s.

Relationship coaching for insecure attachment offers a path to break free from these patterns by helping you recognize and transform the unconscious strategies that drive your interactions.

Whether you’re navigating a current relationship or seeking to create healthier patterns for future connections, coaching can help you move from reactive cycles to a place of connection, security, and shared joy.

Let’s work together to heal attachment wounds and nurture the fulfilling relationship you deserve.

Book a consultation today!

-Esther Perel

"Love is a verb. It's not a permanent state of enthusiasm."